Forgiveness is a transformative practice that not only nurtures personal growth but also serves as a powerful tool for building self-confidence in various areas of life.

Have you ever done something wrong only to beat yourself up again and again and repeat the moment of failing? If you have you are certainly not alone.  In this article, we will explore how forgiveness, both towards oneself and others, is intricately connected to self-belief, connection, focus, and further deeply connected to public speaking confidence. By understanding these critical connections we can begin embracing forgiveness. And through this unlock our true potential, cultivate deeper connections, enhance focus, and ultimately start our journey into developing unshakable confidence in public speaking and beyond.

Self-Forgiveness: The Foundation for Real Confidence:

Self-forgiveness forms the cornerstone of developing self-confidence, particularly in the realm of public speaking. If we think about it – most of us will have had a negative experience of public speaking – from an embarrassing student presentation to potential humiliation in the school assembly. An experience that will have formed the presentation evaluation template we return to each time we speak!  A template so strong that we expect bad experiences, negative judgment, and feedback, creating the symptoms of public speaking anxiety. When repeated this creates a negative self-image, self-belief, and consequently poor levels of speaking competence.

Whilst this may have taken place decades ago, many executives have rarely done the consolidation work to accept the event belongs in the past and doesn’t have to shape your identity today. By releasing ourselves from the weight of past mistakes, failures, or moments of embarrassment, we free our minds from self-judgment and negative self-perception. Embracing self-forgiveness allows us to view public speaking as a learning journey rather than a platform for judgment, fostering a growth Mindset and boosting our belief in our own abilities.

Forgiving others will strengthen our Abilities to Connect and therefore Confidence:

Forgiveness towards others plays a vital role in building connections and cultivating self-confidence, not only in public speaking but also in our relationships and interactions with others. Holding grudges and harbouring resentment erect barriers that hinder genuine connection and understanding.

We are often approaching speaking opportunities in a defensive state, presuming that the audience will judge us, are looking for holes in our performance, and therefore are holding them to pre-judgment before we even begin!  This state is natural given our negative (assumption) school experience. But not something we should hold on to.

By extending forgiveness to others, we create a space for empathy, compassion, and growth, fostering deeper connections and reinforcing our self-belief.

The Process of Forgiveness gives us the strength to start overcoming Fear and Self-Doubt:

Fear and self-doubt are common obstacles that can hinder public speaking confidence. They often stem from past experiences where we may have stumbled, received criticism, or felt humiliated. By practicing self-forgiveness, we release ourselves from the grip of fear and self-doubt. This act of self-compassion allows us to approach public speaking with renewed confidence, free from the burdens of past failures or perceived shortcomings. Furthermore, forgiveness opens the door to growth and learning, which are fundamental elements in building public speaking confidence. By accepting our imperfections and viewing mistakes as valuable opportunities for improvement, we cultivate a growth mindset. This mindset enables us to approach public speaking as a continuous learning journey, where each experience contributes to our growth and development. Embracing challenges, seeking feedback, and refining our skills fosters self-belief and competence in front of an audience.

Practical Steps to help You Build Speaking Confidence through Cultivating Forgiveness and Self-Confidence:

Reflect and Release: Acknowledge past speaking experiences and any self-perceived failures or discomfort. Practice self-compassion and release yourself from self-judgment.

Learn and Grow: Extract lessons and insights from past experiences to fuel your growth. Focus on the progress you have made and the skills you have acquired.

Extend Compassion to Others: Practice forgiveness towards those who may have contributed to your self-doubt or fear. Foster empathy and understanding, allowing for deeper connections and reinforcing your self-belief.

Challenge Negative Self-Talk: Replace self-critical thoughts with positive affirmations and empowering beliefs. Encourage yourself with statements that reinforce your abilities and potential.

Seek Support and Guidance: Surround yourself with a supportive network of friends, mentors, or public speaking groups who can offer encouragement, constructive feedback, and guidance on your journey.

Embrace Mindfulness: Stay present and grounded in the moment while speaking. Let go of self-judgment and focus on delivering your message with authenticity and passion.

Forgiveness is a powerful practice that empowers self-confidence in public speaking and various aspects of life. By cultivating self-forgiveness and extending forgiveness to others, we lay the foundation for personal growth, deeper connections, enhanced focus, and unshakable confidence. Embrace forgiveness as a transformative tool, nurturing self-belief, connection, and focus in public speaking and beyond. As you embark on your journey, remember that forgiveness opens the doors to growth, learning, and the realization of your full potential as a confident and impactful speaker.